The Pisces Cat

by Betty Sleep
Carraig Birmans



February 19 - March 20

PISCES - Dream on, human

Planet: Neptune, the mysterious

The Pisces cat is the most ethereal of felines. They float, they bounce off walls, they defy gravity at every turn. They move with a gait envied by horses and ballerinas alike. Every step is symphony of motion. Cats born under this sign are also the odd Manx out when it comes to fear of water. They have none. Pisces will happily paddle in your bath, sachet around your shower, or stand knee deep in a sink of delicate lingerie. (No, we don't know why.) This fascination extends to heavy rainstorms on your windows, and... heaven forbid... snow flakes which will send them into fits of ecstasy.

Beauty, thy name is Pisces. Luxurious coats, bounteous sprays of whiskers, mysterious pools of gem-like colour in their eyes. And more psychic ability than any $3.99 a minute phone call. Your Pisces cat will not only run from the room when the phone rings (and it's your mother in law), but will pointedly sit on your grocery list while you are writing down "potatoes", to indicate that you are about to need a new pair of pantyhose, if you don't put down "tuna".

The strain of being so completely alluring and unique takes a regrettable toll in that Pisces will sometimes seek herbal relief by destroying an entire box of catnip that you thought had been well guarded.

Therefore, pay attention to the posture, attitude, and rare vocalizations of your Pisces cat. It may in the end be good news of an inheritance…on the other hand, it might be an imminent hairball.

PREY: Nobody knows. They chase many invisible beasts.

RECREATION: Watching running water.

DINING: A little of this, a little of that. And a lot of what you have.

SLEEPING: Satin pillows, cashmere sweaters, and under the fridge.

MUSIC: Singing in the Rain, Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head

COMPANIONS: Barishnykov, Fred Astaire, Mr. Bojangles

ACCEPTABLE HUMANS: Karen Kain, any world ranked figure skater, ballroom dancers.

NAMES: Ariel, Nikita, Mikhail, Rudolph

INTERACTION: Loves to share the rubber ducky in your tub, the sink when you are shaving, and an evening before the fire, reading .

PREVIOUS EXISTANCE: Sidekick to Peter Pan, straight man/cat or psychic at the county fair, telemarketers.

MOTTO: " Nos buncius de wallerii vi feeti upus, parde il exisi." We bounce off the wall six feet up because it is there.


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